Diversity and the Death of England
It’s risky to maintain a friendship with a nation intent on committing suicide.
Jeremy Egerer | March 13, 2026 www.americanthinker.com
The whole point of Impractical Jokers is a few pranksters doing things, on purpose, which violate the norms of our society. This is what’s known as comedy. In real life, the whole point of a border is keeping people out who violate the norms of our society by accident. This is what we know as “having a country.”
Now, we all know that a country can be comical, but things get serious when too many people from too many countries start violating your norms willy-nilly. For instance, do Americans stand in line or crowd to the front? Do we throw trash in the garbage bins or on the street? How loudly can we play our music with the windows open? And can anybody park on the lawn?
Things get more uncomfortable when you ask, at what age is an impregnable women too young? And can you just follow one around if she’s alone, or stare at her on the bus? Do you have to wash your hands before making a stranger a hot dog? And should people own actual dogs? And can you blast prayers at six in the morning from the top of a building? And do you have to hold it all in, or can you just poop on the street?
(Fooled you on that last one. In San Francisco, almost anyone can fit in except Republicans.)
Some other differences go well beyond laws and affect the norms. George Patton writes in his memoirs that when he visited the sultan in Morocco, a leopard broke out of its cage and ran straight into the harem. A lot of screams were heard, and the sultan took off. And when he came back, he told Patton (with a calm face) not to worry. It just got one of the concubines in the neck. The real wives were all safe, so they could carry as usual.
This is the kind of thing that pisses Americans off, but it highlights a crucial difference between American and Arabian society. In 1942 Morocco, a man of eminence could pile up dozens of women of no eminence, and sometimes they got bled to death by leopards. In modern America, a woman of no eminence can pile up men of eminence and bleed them dry on her own. This is what we refer to as “alimony” and “child support,” and if a man tries to escape the harem, we throw him in another one where the sultan is his cellmate.
Thus, so far from being against ethnic diversity, I’m for it — somewhere else. The great value of having other countries (and dare I say it: other states) is that you can view them from a distance. The chief benefit of viewing them from a distance is you can find out which things you want to do yourself and which things you want the cops to shoot at.
This is the conservative’s idea of diversity. It’s a plan where clear distinctions lie between “us” and “them” so we can delineate between the two and plan accordingly. If you like this sort of thing, you believe deeply in Immigration and Customs Enforcement. The problem with the leftist’s diversity is that the diversity happens right at home, so by the time you realize you hate something, you’re stuck with it. Also, you have to like it. This is the whole point of HR and DIE — not to let anyone at work say, “I really support ICE.”
One country I’m really glad is “over there” is Great Britain — for the simple reason that the British will consider anybody “British.” And for the additional reason that if you disagree with who can be British in Britain, you can end up in prison.
That’s why more people get arrested in Britain than in Russia for having opinions. It’s also why Mohamed is the most popular name in the country. And when Pakis started raping thousands of little girls, it’s the reason police swept the accusations under the rug. Simply put, Brits wanted to defend everything but Britishness — and that’s why the United Arab Emirates won’t send any students to college in England. The UAE took one look at the radical Islamists in Oxford and decided that Oxford was too much like Mohamed to let the Islamic students back into Arabia.
Yesterday, our forefathers would have burned the whole world because the British wanted to tax us too much. Today, our forefathers would burn the whole world because the British tax their citizens to fund all the wrong things. I include here such laudable expenditures as disarming law-abiding citizens, hiding crime by foreigners, feeding terrorists and layabouts, making a joke out of God, and terrorizing the ethnically British. Sixty years ago, the whole civilized world was allied against Soviet Russia. Today we have not just an interest, but a moral obligation to have the whole free world ally ourselves against the general ethos of Great Britain.
Whether Russia belongs on our team, in the age of China, is a fair question. Whether the U.K. belongs on it without respecting themselves is obvious. A country should always question whether its allies are the kind of people who commit murder. But a country should never ally itself with a country in the middle of a suicide.
Thus, we wish Rupert Lowe and Restore Britain the best of luck. And if he gets crushed by the DIE machine, we wish Britain itself the worst of it.
